Finally it’s time for the Hare Whip, and all three come to the circle to sing a “new” vulgar hash song about the hairs on her… etc. New? It was probably a chart-topper – in 1918. Samson Letoi must have been a bit surprised when the entire circle joined in, fortissimo. Dismissing his two helpers, S le T called in a couple of FRBs who missed some T-checks but still managed to finish the whole trail.Sir Long & Thin, Windy Bar, and GM Puck Smuggler. For all the FRBs who didn’t make it “They ought to be publically…” Last charge from Hare Whip: PK for charging S le T last time for not calling in Suction Cup. “She’s the meanest…”
TOTW or should have been but the robe was not to be seen… PK called in 2 potential candidates, Hooray and Windy Bar who were charged with being B-I-M-B-Os and given D-Ds. POTW was similarly not around so the contest was held over until next time.
Mystery Whip was Wonton who called in Guest Big Man Go and Maskerbator over the latter’s directions to the run site for BMG which were a bit vague to say the least…”Just head for the AYE and you’re there”
PK then called in Sweet Thighs, Spreads Wide and Iron Crotch who missed a run because they were out drinking… B-I-M-B-Os. But they were not allowed to leave as PK had another revelation: seems the three were practising to form a new group… New Destiny! PK then decided to coach them on how to make the expected body movements, at which the girls tried gallantly but were a little short of Beyonce…So you’d better come to the hash for the rest of the quarter!
Mystery Mystery Whip: Puck Smuggler charges himself, seems Wonton volunteered to be Mwhip, but he was so shocked by not having to beg someone at the last minute, he turned her down. Fortunately sanity prevailed and he re-considered. But the Circle felt he deserved Prick of the Year for that faux pas.
AOB from PS: Does Coo Chi Coo like it original or extra spicy?
AOB from PK: I’ve found a new hobby – Goyang Trainer?
AOBfrom Ditch, calling in the hares – having been told you just need to keep turning right, he found the trail was actually anti-clockwise (left turning)…B-I-M-B-O
From Airborne: presenting the evidence that FRBs missed the Tchecks, here was one found carefully hidden behind a tree on the wrong side of a drain – no wonder it was missed…
AOB from Roo Rooter: calling in Voting B#, he reveals that she said “I miss being GM…” “Here’s to masochists they’re true blue…” and one more for Puck Smuggler and his current propensity for forgetting things.
Fortunately the stand-in Grand Mattress has not forgotten how to shout “On-on-on…” and we head for the exceptional delights of Suction Cup’s excellent Vietnamese cuisine at around 8.35pm.
A Coming of Age Run
4th May 2018
Run Site: Car Park at N Buona Vista & Holland Drive
On-on: On Site a la Vietnam
Hares: Samson Le Toi, Suction Cup & Samson Jr
Total Run/ Circle Attendance: 50, of which 44 Members ( 22 F, 22 M)
Virgins: Not tonight
Guests & Returnees: 6 (3F,3 M)
Next Week’s Hares: Chastity Belt & Wanky Pooh
Run Site: Clementi Stadium Car Park
Circle Scribe: AIrborne, Photos: Count Dracula
The thunder rumbled and a few spots of rain generated anxiety amongst the pack but we were lucky, serious rain did not materialise. Perhaps someone sacrificed a real virgin somewhere – we didn’t have one this night. Of the hares there was no sign at 6.00, and the newly elected president was LAU (Late AS Usual). What to do? Treat the run site as a circle check and go looking for the trail.
The sharper eyes of Stash, Cherry Picker & the FRBs found, not paper as such, but red & white plastic tape, and the pack was off into HDB-land.
Come 8.00 GM called “Circle up” and the shower of undisciplined hashers reluctantly left their personal conversations to find PoKai standing in for the GMs, complete with the original Effme high heels. Plus ca change… “Call in the hares…” What did we think of the run? There were the usual shouts but nothing memorable. In one or two places the marking was thin, but those like Astronut and Airborne who tried to second-guess the run direction went wrong, this was not an easy run to predict. Checks both T and circle were plenty so, for surprising us, it was awarded GOOD RUN.
Where’s your on on? Over there, on site, Vietnamese delectables provided by Suction Cup at only $12 per head. Excellent!
Seems Puck Smuggler is suffering from Alzheimer’s as well as other things. “Refresh my memory, what comes next?” Next week’s hares are Chastity Belt and Wanky Pooh and the run will be in South Clementi, exactly where and what’s the onon were left as a cliff-hanger. Watch this space!
Welcoming the Guests, PoKai called in the girls: After Hours, Big Man Go, and Vivienne, and Men were: Chicken Dickin, Sperm off Ice and Windy Bar. But then GMs had some disturbing news to relate, calling in Wonton. Seems the LCHHH is boring… one guest paid their fees but then went home. So Wonton gets a D-D for not making the Hash greater again. But the story has a happy ending, Dominator will re-join LCHHH.
After Wonton, PoKai has it in for Sperm Off Ice, remembering the hash name of a previous guest, “so SOI, show us your tits! And I will show you my willy” SOI is stunned into silence but warned against playing pocket billiards.