PoTW? Wonton is in, claiming that Cunni Lick Her had left it in her car. And Stash was having none of that – get rid of it. So Wonton calls in Chicken S* for announcing the DnD but then changing the dates? But it seems the tiny one isn’t even on the committee, so it must be our GM’s fault – on in Pr#ck Me. Here you go, take this back to NZ pls
And now we have a belated Hare Whip – Bangcook has a charitable charge – for Handbag and Pr#ck Me, for wearing the All Blacks favourite colour – here’s to the All Blacks, they’re true blue…. And realising the lights had come on (as opposed to 8:24’s run 2 weeks earlier in pitch darkness), Bangcook recognises the turning on powers of our GM’s – Chastity Belt and Pr#ck Me. And now that Pr#ck Me has the PoTW, perhaps she can turn on something else.
And Chastity Belt is confused – how come it’s Bangcook and not Bangcock? Which reminds him of an ancient Confucius saying – man with hard on, walking through door sideways, go Bangcock!
MMW? Pokai has been standing there, wondering what the MMW has to do? Today Chastity Belt confused me a lot. I received a watsapp – “rescue me and be my lifesaver?” Did he mean CPR? Am I supposed to suck on a dummy? But the charge is for fkn up my name from Pokai to Polar in the watsapp message! Who the f is Polar? (And someone suggests - curry puff?). But it seems CB’s spell checker doesn’t accept Pokai – he’s the meanest… And whilst I don’t run nowadays, but when I used to run, I was a FCB? Huh says AS4S – you mean FRB? And Pokai blames her made in China phone. And now for a back dated charge – It’s been durian season, and Pokai was at a durian party with Sooch, Fawlty Bush (look alike) and Strapless. For those of you foreigner – HDB auntie eats durian with fingers – just dive straight in. Those with landed property, use a glove. But not Fawlty Bush – she more atas you know, she uses a spoon – what the f? But Strapless, he even more atas – he wants a spoon and a bowl – why bowl asked FB? - to catch the seed replied Strapless. Here’s to the fine dining, more atas, durian eaters, they’re true blue…..
AoB? Bully is up and out of his chair in a flash. It’s the 50th anniversary of the moon landing. And we have our own Astronaut, but the reason he wasn’t chosen – he can’t park a car and now he’s known as Astronut.
Chastity Belt keeps Bully in. And when Molly says to Bully, shall we go upstairs and make love, Bully replies, we have to choose one!
Kampong GM SoI has an announcement, but struggling, asks Fawlty to relay the finer details – it’s the Kampong HHH 20th Anniversary Celebration run – Saturday 21st Sept – Aussie House on Lagos Circle – Sembawang. Great run and food, Tsingtao beer, band and a goodie bag including a free sarong. See Strapless, Shoeless or Fawltless for registration - $30 for members, $50 for guests. Get in quick as it looks like being oversubscribed
Rooning Sh#t calls in Suzee Wong and In n Out for sitting in a chair whilst we are all fine upstanding members – they’re the meanest…….
Ditch is in, claiming it is only recently he has been relegated to the back of the pack to look after the young ladies – b/s, b/s, it all sounds like b/s…… But tonight there was one of the young gals on the phone – so blur like, up and over the overpass without taking her eyes off the screen. Awesome4some – B.I.M.B.O…..
Circle Jerk has a charge about internet porn on the hash? And several guilty hashers offer themselves up and step in. But CJ has a particular member in mind here. It really shocked me, not your average porn, but more like the DD variety. (Ouch for 11 at the mention of DD). But whilst this member normally seems completely innocent, it appears the Aussies have been experimenting in the kitchen! This mrn I was on the phone, and a porno pic appeared on the committee watsapp group. Quickly followed by, upps, that’s not meant for you! And the porn pic was of a very risen bread bun, with olives. Seems Fawlty Bush has been busy in the kitchen for Fawlty Towers. Here’s to the kinky one, he’s true blue…..
And at 8:28, it’s off to Sammy’s for a cracking curry and more beers, Great circle GM’s, and excellent solo haring by Bangcook. See y’all for the National Day run, if you can find it…..
Run 1950 Circle Report
On-on: Samy’s curry house
Total Run/ Circle Attendance: 52 of which 46 Members (22F, 24M)
Virgins: Not in the Church
Guests/Returnee: 6, Playballs, Dead Fish, Pee Pee, Alisdair Beck, Sperm On Ice, Emma and Rusty Tits
Circle Scribe: Fawlty Towers
Photos: Count Dracula
It’s 7:40pm and Pr#ck Me and Chastity Belt ring the church bells to get the circle going. WDWTOTRun??????? Too many arrows (in opposing directions), too many colours, where was the Sultan? Grudgingly good run offers In n Out – (perhaps becoz it partly followed his trail from 2wks ago and his sparingly spaced arrows were still there?). And so “Good Run” it is, here’s to the virgin LCH3 hare, but he’s the meanest……. OnOn? Yep, $12 for Samy’s (is that rice with curry sauce quips someone?), plus beer, and a burning ring of fire
Next week’s run? It’s Singapore’s National Day run, but oh no, will it be a sh#t run? Since it’s just half the sh#t family – Chicken S* minus the Rooning S*, but with Strapless and Puck Me Lately as co-hares, it’s bound to be a good run. Get yourself to Upper Thomson, heading towards Sembawang, left turn before temple and OCBC? Goodluck, but if you make it, you’ll get a memento.
Visitors? – Astronut has the list, but it’s in his car – B.I.M.B.O….. But in they come – Pee Pee from Phuket, but he’s now in SG so sign him up, Playballs – is he a Philippina? Dead Fish, Alisdair, Emma from the UK and our Kampong GM – Sperm On Ice. Returnees – Rusty Tits, but he’s fallen off already
Hare Whip? Bangcook looks like he’d forgotten about preparing his whipping duties, so Pr#ck Me generously gives him some think time
Mystery Whip? After the usual falsies – Astronut emerges from the shadows, with plenty of material. First off it’s Bully for a parking misdemeanour – (at his age he should be allowed to park in the circle) – here’s to the inconsiderate one….. And out on the run tonight, at a circle check up an incline, Astronut was striding out, and as he passed someone, they said “that’s not allowed”. Here’s to the rule-maker – Bagless, he’s true blue…. And on that same hill, a young Singaporean gal commented to the Astronut – oh, you’re running, and racing up the hill – wah, so strong ahhhh says the super impressed Awesome4some! And Posh Pussy chips in – so strong ahhh, can last more than 2 minutes? She’s alright, she’s alright….. Feeling somewhat emboldened, Astronut raises the bar and calls in Poser. As he took off his sweaty t-shirt and threw it into the boot (that would be the engine in his case?), Poser complained – ahh so smelly ahh, smells like sh#t? And Astronut blames the nearby tree which had been fertilised with manure. Really says the disbelieving Poser, edging closer – it looks like, smells like, it must be…..
Circle Jerk is in, pulling a PSA out of his ass – it’s the Quad run on 24th August, in truly Asia – JB Malaysia. Just $30, but the Singaporeans prefer to pay in Ringgit
Chiming in, Chastity Belt announces the Bring a Friend run. It’s at the very end of Chestnut Avenue, on Friday the 13th of September, with Fawlty hares – what could possibly go wrong? And it’s free for LCH3 first timers
The committee are feeling particularly generous tonight - time for some awards? Sooch for 700 (theoretical) runs, and there’s no way it’s coming off. 500 for Chastity Belt. Rooning Sh#t has clocked up 800 short cuts, and Fawlty Towers has taken 10yrs to make a ton – thankfully the carpark is dimly lit – here’s to our hashers, they’re true blue….