GMs Voting B then called in Roo Rooter for being a B-I-M-B-O, before doing some announcements: Hare is needed for 6th April, volunteers please!
First Aid Course is on 24th March, payment direct to Grand Mistress please.
Shipyard Flasher jumped in to remind hashers of Foetus’ farewell bash at the Prince of Wales, Little India, on Saturday at 8pm onwards – roll up to get in before happy hour ends at 9!
Mystery Whip Stick her Shock called in Mother Mary & Dirty Hacker. After being together for 25 years, DH wanted to spend $500 on a joy-ride in a helicopter. MM was not keen but agreed after a while. Riding the chopper was little different from being at home, “when MM was in the helicopter
I wanted to say something but didn’t have the chance…” Take a D-D.
Ditch & Sweet Thighswere next under the whip, something about an HDB couple which Scribe couldn’t catch due to MWhip constantly spinning round while talking. No wonder she’s troubled by vertigo “They’re the meanest..”
Then it was the turn of Roo Rooter & Puul Toy who seem to be losing their grip as they couldn’t get the lid off a jar.
GMs has a charge for Mother Mary, who went to the wrong car park. “Follow me, I’m a native…” “Why was she born so beautiful…”
Ding dong goes the CO2 cylinder as Maskerbator ups the fizz level, announcingPuck Smuggler and TOTW… No shortage of candidates this week, first in is Juicy Pussy as a stand-in for the opposition to the Donald, talking point but not a real victim. Next up Strapless, very Trump-y this week, shouting “Follow me, I’m a local…” then leading the run astray. After that, Machine when back in Hokkaido experienced Japanese bureaucracy from the lady who dealt with his visa application but seems he was able to corral chaos and make it happen. But the robe of office went to Airborne who was overheard telling Durian Dog that if it were not for French intervention (when America was losing the War of Independence), the US would still be a British colony. “Why was he born…”
Mystery Mystery Whip fell to Circle Jerk who straightaway called in Machine over his love or otherwise of spiders. This was followed swiftly by Puck Me Lately as a look-alike for Fawlty Bush, short-cutting through a hotel to get to the toilet. “I like to do it s-l-o-w-l-y!” was the explanation…but “She’s all right…”
The Hash exhibits many facets, rather like the Karma Sutra, but a new one came to light as Circle Jerk noticed Running S#t’s fascination with CumPuss’ ankles. The mind boggles at the contortions necessary to combine this fetish with other Yogic positions. “Here’s to the Ankleman, he’s true blue…” Giving us our money’s worth, CJ recalled a Guest asking “Where’s the Singapore River?” and Strapless’ answer “At least 1km away..” whilst less than 100m from the said stream. We’ll never trust “Follow me I’m a local” again.
AOB now, and Corny Linguist couldn’t get away from the walkers & talkers (takes one to know one - Scribe), running round in circles looking for the drink stop. Fitness fanaticsShipyard Flasher and Foetus (?? - Scribe) said “let’s go to a building site” The unexpected bonus was that they did actually find this legendary drink stop. “Here’s to fitness freaks, they’re true blue…”
Final AOB from Juicy Pussy who called in Maskerbatorwho was looking for his bananas, but it seemed they had been scoffed by Cereal Killer. Or vice versa! Hunger was the spur, so needing no more encouragement, with the power invested in her by her impressive vocal chords, Grand Mistress Voting B called “On-on-on!” at 8.55pm
Date: Friday 9th March 2018
Run Site: Tat Boon Liat Bldg Car Park
On-on: Sin Hoi Sai Seafood Restaurant, 55 Tiong Bahru Rd #01-59
Hares: PoKai, Trolley Dolly, CumPuss & Cunni Lickher
Total Run/ Circle Attendance: 51 of which Members 46 (24 F & 22 M )
Virgins: not as such
Visitors & Returnees: 5 (2 F, 3 M)
New Member: not this week
Milestones: awaiting T-Shirts
Next Week’s Hares: Puck Smuggler & SOI
Run Site: Tagore Drive
On-On: Xian Seafood, 81 Tagore Lane, #01-10
Circle Scribe: Airborne, Photos: Count Dracula
Tat Boon Liat car park is a convenient site for a city run. It takes in some of the greener parts and a fair few hill-climbs. What a pity that the last two runs from there have suffered irritation from hyperactive security. Being Hashers, of course we take this kind of thing in our stride, on the principle that anything not actually forbidden is okay. In the out-turn the threats to call the police did not materialise. So it was that the business of an EGM was swiftly and agreeably discharged, and GM & GMs could get the hares to tell us about the run actually before 6pm and get an on-time on-on.
“A drink stop…” they said. Well, the run was typically devious from this pair of hares, with plenty of checks both circle and T, and the direction afterwards far rom obvious. The tail enders saw more of the FRBs than usual, and short-cutters were frequently defeated. Coo Chi Coo got caught in a cage, a field surrounded by a 10-foot chain link fence with no holes. We saw a lot of the Singapore River, upstream & downstream, and paid a visit to Outram Park, up to the top & down again. Trail marking was a bit patchy, now clear, now hidden, then gaps. As we neared the rumoured drink stop, the trail petered out altogether, so many runners gave up the search in favour of the certainty of Maskerbator’s thirst quenchers.
What did we think of it? The usual complaints, plus “Too many banana trees…” but nothing substantial so the Circle grudgingly gave it aGOOD RUN. The on-on was within walking distance in Tiong Bahru Road, and anyone with an Android phone and “Location” switched on, has probably been getting requests for reports from Google ever since.
No virgin, but welcome Guests & Returnee: Girls: Beryl, Gemmi/ Minnie Prick, Guys: Chong, Cereal Killer & Machine allowed back by G-String for good behaviour.
Hare Whip: Trolley Dolly has been to the fancy dress shop again with another exotic costume, this time he’s a Roman Centurion complete with helmet, cape and kilt, and PoKai showing off her legs in a shortie tunic. Unless it was the Ides of March of which Julius Caesar had to beware, there was no answer to Saliva’s question – “why the Roman get-up?”
First in the Circle, TD wants the hashers who discovered the drink stop - Hooray, Foetus and Prick Me were among the few. Next in: Rescue Assistant Hare CumPuss given a D-D for being an indispensable help to the lead hares.
And then…a story from Uncle Tee Dee… man is looking for a flower shop and sees one with a nicely floral decoration in the window. “I want a bouquet for the wife,” he says. “For your wife??” says the assistant, “Sorry but it’s illegal in the EU”. “Illegal? A bunch of flowers?”…”Sir this is a circumcision clinic, not a flower shop!!” Next was Iceland’s insisting that their candidate for Miss Universe should take a medical test to prove her gender. Sweet Thighs was the look-alike chosen for Miss Iceland, there was no need for further evidence so “She’s all right…”