Mystery2 Whip is Samson Letoi, who wants to sort out the silent FRBs by exampling one who not only doesn't call when on paper, but calls falsely when nowhere near the trail...Come in Butt Wiper... "He's the meanest...” News time, over in the United Kingdom, the burning political question is not so much going through with Brexit but the conduct of the PM Theresa May - . It seems that Theresa may, or, on the other hand, Theresa may not... Is she extremely smart or extremely dumb, which is it? M2 Whip wants to take a local sounding, so calling in After Hours as a look-alike, he invites comment... not surprisingly the conclusion is "She's dumb, she's dumb, she's really really dumb..." Away from Britain, a literally burning issue is the number of wildfires started by smokers throwing away their butts. M2Whip sought out the hash offenders - No SOI, but Chicken Dicken, Pays 2 Come, & Cunni Lick Her (PoKai is keeping a low profile)... "Here's to arsonists, they're true blue..."

Down to AOB, first up is GMs Prick Me with the good news - Two new members, After Hours and Windy Bar, after running several times as guests, have signed up, welcome!

AOB from Circle Jerk, having got through a challenging part of the trail was concerned about Tight Lips, who seemed to be taking a long time. "Are you all right?"...no reply, so louder..."Are you all right?!" "I'm coming, I'm coming!!" "She's all right, she's all right,..."

Cunni Lick Her is next with a bottle on his head, calling in In & Out for exhibitionism. Out with the Harriets last Wednesday, I&O needed a leak. However rather than going behind a tree, he stood in front of it, facing the circle. At changing time he dropped his pants not behind but in front of his car. Same behaviour was repeated with Lion City... "Here's to flashers, they're true blue..."

AOBfrom Handbag, who reminded the Circle that 1st August is (or was) Yorkshire Day. Every Nation has a district whose inhabitants believe they are beings superior to their fellow men. In the US it's Texas, in Britain it's Yorkshire... (in Singapore it's the whole bloody country - Scribe). "You can tell a Yorkshireman... but you can't tell him much," says the adage. To illustrate the truth of this, Handbag called in Astronut. "In the recent Games, Yorkshire men won more medals than the whole of Canada..." "He's the meanest..."

In & Out called in the perpetrators of a lot of chatter in one sector of the circle: Bibrator and Ad Nauseam. Seems AN was making out well with Bibrator but nattering so loud I&O couldn't hear what was going on in the circle..."Why were they born so beautiful..."

Public Service Announcement time: Circle Jerk reminded that tomorrow's SK9HHH run out at Seletar would be a proper jungle run but to remember to bring red & white gear for National Day.

AOB from Juicy Pussy making a welcome appearance after a long trip in the UK, was looking for takers for a size D-cup bra. The garment in question was solid gold, made for Malaysia’s ex-PM’s wife, but now up for auction. JP called in Handbag, In & Out and Circle Jerk to see which came closest to size D. This was a cue for Suzy Wongto dig into her fancy dress bag and come up with an instant sex-change kit which she strapped on to In & Out, who was transformed arguably up to size D. No wrinkled dugs here! “Why was he born so beautiful…”

Final AOB from I&O also on the subject of making out, this time it was PoKai who was strutting her stuff expertly with a gentleman until she paused for breath, when Suzy Wong interrupted with "Oh and by the way, how is your granddaughter?"... "Why was she born so beautiful..."

Which was a perfect moment for GM Puck Smuggler to call "We are ON-ON-ON!"

NEWS…Puck Smuggler has oiled his way into the corridors of power and got N Parks toAPPROVE his run route for Celebration Run 1900 on 17th August. PS is also one of the hares for SHHH Run No 3000. Which run? What else, but the BALL BREAKER! Rumour has it that for our Run 1900 he’s been practising for the Monday big job. But don’t worry, your resident octogenarian will make sure that nothing will be inflicted upon the pack that they can’t handle. GMs Puck Me Lately has also discovered a new eating place that promises to challenge the Red Lantern. All’s set fair for a bumper Celebration Run 1900!

MORE NEWS… Everyone must be aware now that disposable plastics are becoming public enemy No 1 after D Trump & Russ Putin. GMs Puck Me Lately wants LCHHH to set an example for this over-consuming Republic. We are going to have to work on this, because things like D-Ds have developed into a habit for disposables. Also we don’t want to overwork the already challenged Hash Brew. But we have to start somewhere, and one way to do it is for members to follow the good example of Astronut, Cherry Picker and Mother Mary, and BYO. No decision yet but one suggestion is to change T-shirts for beer mugs to further encourage people.