GMs reported that on this very day the (not very) United Kingdom departs from the EU so a representative sample of Brits includingAirborne, Butt Wiper, Chastity Belt, Circle Jerk, Handbag & Rooning S#t received the valedictory “F*k off you c*nts...” This was tempered with a consolation D-D and welcome from the GMs on behalf of “All of us who are already outside the EU”.
GMs had a reminder of everybody’s birthday – Rep Roo Rooter got a Hashy Birthday serenade for getting to 51.
Guest Mystery Whip was Puck Smuggler, who said he’d heard something new today. “Cannot change in a public car park – SG very strict – can go to jail, lah – Sweet Tongue is told “She’s dumb...” Next seems the FRBs were in Strapless mode on this run at a check – “Go this way”, “No, that way...” Juicy Pussy andSperm off Ice represented the disputing FRs. The explanation, said PS, was that SOI couldn’t see the check... another dumb one, and finally (and inevitably) PS quoted POTUS’ gratuitous predictions for China that were met with the reply “We know already, dumb ass!”
POTW is 8.24 and he sets up a competition for who is to be the next lucky dick. First in is Posh Pussy “I don’t come on Friday’s, I only come on Sundays.” How sad! Then Diet Coke Head (LAL Awesome 4some) led the FRBs astray “Here’s the trail...” but the flowers she found were the wrong kind. On in Cherry Picker (LAL Ayam Zinking) for the EU minus one, and Strapless who wins overwhelmingly according to the shout-ometer. So POTW is, appropriately Chinese...
GMs gave full marks to 8.24 for his enthusiastic parading of the phallus and then GM wanted to credit the T-Shirt sponsors for a fantastic commemorative T-shirt. Creatively designed and even wearable in polite company, it was quickly sold out...”Here’s to the sponsors, they’re true blue...” all in for a photo session.
AOB time andCoo Chi Coo was in mental overload over the complex directions to today’s run site. The Car park number (UN0034) would have been enough but we got all this stuff about the Hai Lam Sua Tee Kong Temple with OCBC Bank and https://blahblahblah and Google maps. He wants to charge the Newletter editor but he goes on too long and it’s “3-2-1 get it D-D-D-D.
Sperm off Ice and Juicy Pussy were seen having a cosy twosome in the back of the X-Roads beer van, seems they were swapping T-shirts (well that’s their story) but “They’re all right...”
Juicy Pussy wants to reprise the confusion among the FRBs over the check at the North end of the trail. Seems that things got a bit heated and not altogether hash-worthy. However, in the spirit of this celebratory evening the GMs decided to keep the peace and move on to the next AOB which was...
Croc o’S#t calling in Ditch as representing the Mid-Westerners (of the US), seems he hails fro Detroit and the 2 virgins are from N Dakota. These people know extremes of temperature, hot in summer, cold in winter, so come prepared... but it never gets cold in Singapore. “Here’s to ....”
With tummies rumbling and the Circle getting restive the GMs decided to close up AOB and so with full compliments to hares and sponsors for a memorable run, it was ON-ON-ON at 8.40pm.
Friday 31st Jan 2020 - Chinese New Year Run
Run Site: Upp Thomson Car Pk UA0034 by Lakeview & the Temple
Hares: All the Chinese, led by Durian Dog & Strapless
On-on: Talk Cock Drink Beer.
Total Run/ Circle Attendance: 57 of which 45 Members( 21F, 24M)
Virgins: 2: Laura & Myles
Guests & Returnees: (3F, 9M)
Circle Scribe: Airborne Photos: Count Dracula
GM Chastity Belt with Voting B*, no stand-in, the real thing GMs! called “Circle Up” at 8.00pm.
So WDWTODR? Well, this middle of the road hasher enjoyed it. Heading off into the landed property area NW of the run site, the hares took us into a maze of streets well-sown with T-checks, the setting sun making the pack look positively angelic. More left-right then the general direction took us along the fence at the back of McRitchie jungle, scrabbling along a sloping terrain chewed up by wild boars. Chalk arrows and bog roll gave way to dandelions and blossoms of cempaka putih as we turned downhill into NParks territory at the back of Windsor estate. Cunningly laid checks kept the pack ever within earshot of the FRBs (who were unusually noisy). The measure of a clever hare is whether the FRBs are still in sight of the pack by the middle of the run, and this was certainly so as we ran along the NParks path at the back of McRitchie reservoir. FRBs were evidently harassed by so many checks - see later in the Circle Report. Not a short run... the GPS wrist watches were reporting 9km as we turned left out of McRitchie towards the drink stop at Thomson Rd. The FRBs must have added another 2km from their energetic checking out of the trail. Orange juice with a generous spike of Russian spirit was dished out at the drink stop by Ditch & Sweet Thighs. Not only was there refreshment, but hares & sponsors also provided a suitably ratty-coloured T-shirt.
“Let’s have the hares in the Circle”, said GM. There were many, as well as Durian Dog & Strapless there were Chicken S#t, Awesome 4some and literally all the Chinese. So, when the question was put to the Circle, what else could be the verdict but GOOD RUN ?. Some members even felt it was an exceptional and memorable run. “Here’s to hares, they’re true blue..” accompanied by “Where’s your on-on?” “Cross the main road at the traffic lights, it’s at the place known for drinking beer & talking cock” explained Strapless.
GMs called in the Virgins, Laura and Myles both from the mid-west of the US, and made to come by Puck Smuggler. “Here’s to virgins, they’re true blue...” and they’d like to come again.
Next, it was Guests,a goodly bunch including Penny, Sabine, Cereal Killer, Chong, Tibd, Sperm off Ice, who were “All right, All right, a little bit...” and then it was the turn of Returnees, who were Sweet Tongue, Sweet Lips, Blur like Sotong, Eskimo, Impossible, Puck Smuggler,& Skidmark. Also all right, but given the encouragement of “Ought to be publically pissed on...” with their D-Ds.
Next Week’s Hares... are Saliva & Sweet Tongue, the run site for Run 1977 is at Watten Heights Playground and the run is billed as “Foreplay - Grounds for the Crazy Rich”. The mind boggles.
Hare Whip # 1 was decided after a committee meeting of the hares and it was the diminutive but feisty Awesome 4some taking the lead. She called in first Fake Virgin for some heinous felony, and then the trio of Skidmark, Bagless and Croc o’ S#t for rather obviously eating all the pies. Having done so A4 then called back the trio, adding Coo Chi Coo & Circle Jerk as role models for being in need of losing weight. So many folk in the circle challenged Hash Brew who had trouble keeping up with D-Ds.
Hare whip #2 was Wonton who called in 2 short cutters, one the GMs, no less, the other PoKai who managed to get to the drink stop without the trouble of doing the run... “They ought to be...”. Next, she thought it appropriate to recognise 2 Canadians for giving extra funding to GoS so Astronut & Eskimo duly received D-Ds.