But then it was… time… for… the.. Mystery Whip – Croc o’ Shit. Co’S being a language teacher is particular about the pronunciation & spelling of his name and made sure we all got it right. Having been a Monday runner and left behind, Co’S found that “You’re never alone on the Friday Hash … there’s always someone slower than you!” “Come in Astronut!” Co’S trusted Astronut to lead him, but found they had walked not 7 ½ but 17 ½ km. As the hares had marked the trail with arrows drawn on tree bark, and one piece had stuck to A’s shoe, the trail followed them rather than vice versa. “Here’s to false hares…”
In his previous LCH3 manifestation Co’S had been lean and keen but now people commented on his fuzzy appearance. Was it fur or hair? Telecum, conspicuously without either on his head, disagreed that his forearms were hairy. “That’s fur” he said. They agreed on one thing, that no-one ever referred to “pubic fur”. Next Co’S went into the naming game, having discovered that Sooch was not a hash name at all but a combination of her Chinese forenames. By a convoluted argument involving the French language he teaches unsuspecting students, Co’S proposed Souche (a tree root, stump or stub) for her hash name. Either it was too intellectual for the circle or they were just not in the mood, but it didn’t arouse enthusiasm.
So GMs PML thought it was the right moment to ask “Who’s got the POTW?” Only PS and the holder know, apparently, so it’s Butt Wiper who has to disclose the plastic priapus. For moral or otherwise support, he calls in Tight Lipswho will be, for a short while “without the benefit of me around” (such a modest guy - Ed). The only competition for POTW is Chicken Dicken for giving a weak excuse to Tiger Lily for missing the last run. So, fully endorsed by the Circle it’s “Keep the Pric#” – in the family, at least. “Why was he born so beautiful…”
For Mystery Whip 2nd Bagless enters the fray and says he’s shocked by the behaviour of FRBs Rooning S#t, Butt Wiper & 8.24 running in front of traffic against the N Buona Vista traffic lights. Ditch andAstronut also get charged but with an unintelligible crime (I really must get my hearing aid tuned into Scottish again – Ed) Whatever it was, “They’re the meanest…”
Preparing for AOB, PML has a charge on Cherry Picker for grinding on the run on whilst Four Soreswas leading. “He ought to be…”
Now real AOB, with Trolley Dolly calling in first Mother’s Tongue for wearing a FitBit step counter, which several girls were sporting. One was PoKai, whose step counter recorded 3000 steps whilst she was sitting down playing Mah Jong…can you believe these things? “Here’s to the fit ones…”
More AOB, Mother’s Tongue first calling in Sway, she’s all right, but then she calls the miserly In & Out, whilst Running S#t has Cherry Picker for outrageous short-cutting and what they all have in common is “They’re the meanest…”
Last AOB is from Tight Lips who reminds us we have a whole Hashing week-end to enjoy – Kampong on Saturday which Strapless is haring, and on Sunday Ayam Zinking is laying the trail for the hash of the same name.
“And with that…” cries PS, “It’s On-onon!”
Run 1926 Circle Report
Friday 15th Feb 2019
Run Site: Car Park at N Buona Vista x Holland Dr
Hares: In & Out, Suzy Wong, After Hours
On-on: Holland Drive Block 43
Total Run/ Circle Attendance: 57 of which 48 Members (23 F, 25 M)
Virgins: Not as such
Guests & Returnees: 9 (5F,4M)
Next Weeks Run: see first page
Circle Scribe: Airborne, Photos: Count Dracula
This run site is still a good starting place for several trails in the locality, though currently it’s overshadowed by the Far East Organisation’s Holland Village development. FEO has appropriated the car park for their site office, leading to some uncertainty about one of our favourite places. However, it was all right on the night, as they say. The run was well peppered with checks but we saw not much jungle, slipping past it rather than entering, and saw rather a lot of the Greenway… it was, as someone remarked, an In & Out trail, but Suzy Wong claimed credit. Unusual was the use of tree bark and odd bits of wood to carry chalk arrows which might otherwise have upset Nparks.
At 6.00pm, impatient FRBs had called for the hares before the GM Puck Smuggler was able to get into the starting circle, so he was careful to shout his “Gather Round” at 5 minutes before 8pm so as not to be upstaged again. WDWTOTR produced the usual limp responses…”Too much shiggy” (shoes were universally clean) “Too many drink stops” (it was a dry run) … but nothing sufficiently objectionable for GM to award a Hash S#t, so GOOD RUN “Here’s to hares, they’re true blue”.
Something slipped out of sync at this point, Puck Me Lately earning herself a B-I-M-B-O by calling for Next Week’s Hare. Circle Jerk obliged and threw in a charge for good measure, summoning Puck Smuggler andFawlty Towers (LaL Cherry Picker) for rescheduling the run not once but twice. (The Happy Anniversary run was to be staged in Arcadia Rd but it was found to be not parking-friendly so has shifted to Bukit Brown – Ed). CJ said anyone wearing one of his T-shirts at the circle would get a free beer at the on-on. How about the rest of us?
PS carried the can for stepping out of order, then called for Virgins (not tonight dear) and Guests. These were part genuine guests Bancook, Bush Diver, Handbrake, LEV and ROLV, and part regularsSway, Telecum and Tiger Lily who haven’t yet been persuaded to join up. “They ought to be publically…”
Back to the proper agenda now, Hare Whip In & Out was quick to charge his cohere before she could take a breath & fight back. “Hare Whip? We don’t usually have a Hare Whip do we?” Suzy Wong had said…”here’s to Alzheimers…” by which time SW was ready to reply con gusto claiming she had done everything including setting the run.