Now it’s time for the…Mystery Whip and Blur Like Sotong has been given the floor. Pausing only to give PS credit for giving him 24 hours notice, he homes in on the language differences between US English and English, not only in spelling but usage too. He has prepared slides for the exposition and soon we see colour and color, organise and organize and so on. He’s also brought in his experience of euphemisms, where the British are more sensitive than Americans… if you don’t agree with something said by a colleague, the Brit says “I hear you…” The Yank says ”F*# Off”, apparently. Finally, seems our favourite (US) entertainer Mr T got it wrong when he wrote of “pouring” over a document instead of “poring” It’s not recorded what liquid he actually poured, probably petrol (sorry gasoline) “Here’s to Americans, they’re true blue…” Thanks to Blur Like Sotong for a well-researched spot.
Which brings us neatly to TOTW. Sir Long & Thin is finally off to pastures new on Monday 9th and wants to avoid a diplomatic faux pas by leaving the robe of office here in SG. In accordance with custom & practice (note the spelling) he leaves the choice of most Trumpworthy to the Circle. Stick her Shock, Goody Bag and Tight Lips are up for selection, and it’s SHS that gets the biggest cheer, along with shouts of “Off-off-off…”
Milestone Time and we have two rather awesome scores: Poser after 900 runs and Wonton 800 – well done girls and sorry for the long wait for your T-shirts.
Mystery Mystery Whip brings PoKai back into the circle, she says she has been told by PS to make fun of Americans. “All right,” she says, “when in the circle make a fool of yourself…!” I have to ask permission for this: Sweet Thighs “I have spent 10 hours researching this…” “Bullshit, bullshit…” comes the cry. Undaunted she continues…”while we in SG have National Day, Indonesia and Malaya have Hari Merdeka, Norway has National Day, the Yanks talk about 4th July, and expect everyone to know what it means…” “They’re the meanest…”
As Hash Brew, PoKai came in for some stick as tonight’s water supply was deemed inadequate by some. This turned out to be a false charge as the blame lay elsewhere… Why was she borne so beautiful…”
And now for an Announcement fromWonton the Dinner & Dance will be on 10th November, and the venue will be confirmed at the next run. Save the date folks, and your pennies too. One more date to mark: Interhash Quadripartite run is on 1st December and will be hosted by the Tanjong Puteri Hash over there in JB.
First AOB from Coo Chi Coo: who’s heard a repeatable riposte from a conversation between PoKai… ”I need some more exercise…” and Puul Toy…”Your mouth must be in good shape…”
AOB and a quick bum flash from Goody Bag who has a problem sizing shorts: “Why is it that American sizes are so much bigger than Euros…” Answer: “Their asses need more cover!”
AOB from Butt Wiper “We have carte blanche from the GM to pick on the Americans so, okay, call in Tight Lips…”Bring a torch, is the advice from hares, so I did… ”Give me the torch,” says Tight Lips. I never saw it again. I had to creep through the tunnel in darkness… “She’s the meanest…” And that’s not all…BW calls in all the American females…”Leave the circle if you remembered to bring your knickers…” Who’s left behind? Tight Lips of course… should be wearing a red hat.
AOB from Mother’s Tongue, calling in Goody Bag and giving a demo of GB’s amazing dexterity in getting a leg over. Here’s to the agile, they’re true blue…” And evidently that’s not enough, now Mother’s Tongue slates the two Mystery Whips for complaining about short notice for their duties. “When I first joined the Hash, Whips were nominated in the Circle so stop whining…”
Final AOB is from 8.24, who wants to give a final piece of advice to Sir Long & Thin for use in his next duty, an unpronounceable but terribly useful word from the local language. Following which it’s that fond and loving farewell Hashy song after which the GM calls “on-on-on” and we all FO.
Lion City HHH : Run 1894 Circle Report
6th July 2018 – 4th July Run
Run Site: Springleaf Avenue
On-on: Wong Chiew Eating House
Hares: Puck Smuggler, Stash, 8.24
Total Run/ Circle Attendance: 47,of which 39 Members (20 F, 19 M)
Guests & Returnees: 8 (2 F, 6 M)
Milestones: Wonton 800 runs and Poser 900.
Next Week’s Hares: Ayam Zinking, Pokai, Trolley Dolly
Run Site: Blackmore Drive
On-On: Forture Seafood aka Red Lantern
Circle Scribe: Airborne, Photos: Count Dracula
Despite Scribe’s attempts to decoy hashers to the wrong site, 37 members and 7 guests found their way to Springleaf Avenue Playground in time to start, the other 3 were late. The run must have satisfied the most shiggy-starved runners and though it stopped short of a swimming water hazard, had most of the challenges expected of a strongly Monday-influenced Hash. These included trippy and thorny jungle, slippery drains, mud banks and a long, dark and mysterious tunnel. So it was that our new beer supply was seriously challenged by several oversized thirsts, and rose to the occasion. There were a few grumbles about a shortage of water, but since most of us are only there for the beer this was not life-threatening. Any bruised feelings were quickly restored by the freebie running vest dispensed with the usual generosity of Uncle Sam.
GM Puck Smuggler and GMs Puck Me Lately once more together, got a circle together almost on time and straightaway called in the hares. The answers to the overwhelming question were, as usual, mixed, with some claiming too little of what others said was too much. Since the GM was disqualified from judgment, Puck Me Lately declared it a GOOD RUN. “Here’s to Hares, they’re true blue…”
With that formality done, Puck Smugglerwanted to celebrate a very important American, the designer of the commemorative shirt, Stick her Shock,. “Here’s to the American with the dream…”
Do we have any Virgins? Yes, just one, Jason all the way from UK. “Who made you come?” “My father …” “What did you think of the run?” Jason tried to say “Smash!” but what came out was “Trash!” leading the circle to think he had been put up to it by the said father, Airborne. “They ought to be publically…”
Now it’s the turn of the Visitors, bringing in Girls: Mothers Tongue & Yumi, Men: Benjamin, Erik, Pukkakl and Telecum, and lone Returnee Sir Long & Thin. “Here’s to visitors…”
Hare Whip, suitably draped in the starspangled banner, is Stash and as tradition would have it, decides to hose his co-hares, 8.24 & PS. 18,000 toilet rolls, said HW, is what it took to lay the trail, but PS didn’t turn up for the recce due to falling asleep. “Why were they born so beautiful…”
Next Week’s Hares: this should have been Goody Bag’s birthday run, but alas she has family support duties, so Ayam Zinking is joined by the pair that must be this year’s most experienced hares Pokai and Trolley Dolly. Run details are as above.