Commander in Chief - Chastity Belt takes the floor for a RWC charge. And who will support the Kiwi’s? (all the Aussies of course). On in Back Beard, Tight Grip and Sweet Thighs. And how about the English? – it has to be Handbag. And what about the gay Welsh referee (didn’t he like sheep?), who recently passed away, and as he arrived at the Pearly Gates, St. Peter says, “you can come in if you’ve done something heroic and courageous.” “That’s easy says the Welshman. It’s England v New Zealand, there’s just 2 minutes to go, and England are up by 2 points. There’s a scrum in the England half, and a pass flies out and the hooker takes it over the line for a try. Actually, he didn’t ground the ball, but I awarded it anyway. “We don’t have a record of that in heaven” says St. Peter – when did it happen? “About 45 seconds ago, when I was in the Kiwi stand!” Here’s to the rugby heads…..
Can we get all the Scorpio’s in – Astronut, Stash, Strapless, Mother Mary, Fawlty Towers, Iron Crotch – here’s to the (yabbie) T shirt funders, they’re true blue…
PoTW?Cherry Picker wants to get rid of it. It’s a body part, yet so many hashers are brazenly promoting their body parts? Strapless came back limping – perhaps he needs a third leg? And tonight No Rection forgets to bring a torch, but no problem – Posh Pussy simply put her hand into her wonder bra and pulled out a torch, and No Rection saw the light. Then Comes Quietly was spotted on the run – stopping in his tracks. Was he checking for where the trail went? No, he was checking his heart rate (perhaps No Rection needed to check his also?). And then there was Back Beard. Deliberately not allowing Cherry Picker to pass, so he could offload a fart in his general direction. And the pack has spoken, and the Pr#ck is off to KL for a holiday with Back Beard (or maybe it will be taken care of by Pink Fanny in SG?)
And now, it really really, is time, for, the, Mystery, Mystery, whip??? Cherry Picker is faking again, but this time it really is him. First off it’s the GM – he is supposed to know everything, but according to CP, he is completely clueless. Last week he called the hare to be Mystery Whip. This week he calls the PoTW holder to be MMW. He’s a Bimbo, but since Wonton always knows better, she gets a 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, down, down, down, down. Now it seems CP is doing his secret training, signing up for external events, so he can still beat Maggot home on the Sunday Hash. Most people sign up for the 10km run, Tiger Lily of course goes for the 25km, and she is in it to win it. But Handbag has signed up for the 50km run – I just compete against myself. CP – at least he is a realist. And since Puck Me Lately is in India, CP has no more BIMBO charges and heads for the beer truck.
Have we started AoB?Sweet Thighs just has to charge Pink Fanny. Ok so we know she likes to cool down with a fan, but this thing is getting enormous – it would put a Dyson to shame. On in Pink Fanny – here’s to the big blow job, she’s true blue…
Meanwhile back at the ranch,Chastity Belt is using the fan to cool his bollocks? And with his bollocks back to safe operating temperature, Chastity Belt calls in Iron Crotch, for helping us celebrate the festival of light, and bringing Deepavali snacks and candles. Here’s to our token Indian, Hari Krishna – 3, 2, 1, D D D D…….
Awesome4some calls in Astronut. Having done 30 Scorpio runs, you would think he might get the T shirt sizes right, right? Asking Astronut what size she might be, AS4S is advised to take a small size. And so off she goes and tries it on, but it feels a bit tight, and so she compares herself to the busty Topless, and decides she needs to upgrade. MeanwhilePosh Pussy asks Astronut the same question, and in his esteemed opinion she is a medium. And so AS4S returns to the back of the BM, and asks Astronut for a medium, just like Posh Pussy’s. But still after trying it feels a bit tight. Surely I can’t be a large? AndTopless checks and it’s still a small size. (And Astronut is trying to hide a sly grin). And Coo Chi Coo chips in – take it off and I’ll tell you your size! He’s the meanest….
Mother’s Tongue calls in Ayam Zinking and Bagless, who have been caught airing their balls on Pink Fanny’s fan. Whilst it might be good for your health to air your balls, does the kilt wearing Scot really need to? They’re alright, they’re alright, they’ve got……
Juicy Pussy is in. We all heard about the marathon record breaker Kipchoge, who broke the 2 hour barrier last week? But to do it, he had to use a pacer. Is the hash now competitive? Some trying to break the record here too. Last week Bibrator had a pacer also, but this week she could not afford, so today she used Durian Dog as her pacer – why were they born so beautiful…..
Mother Mary reminds us that the Scorpio run, now in it’s 30th year, was started by herself, a very young Stash, and Batman. But Batman’s powers ran out and he’s gone on to higher places. On on Batman...
Chastity Belt calls inTopless (why wouldn’t he?). Topless’ husband and son went to the pharmacy, so the husband could buy some condoms. And the son starts asking questions. Dad, why is there 3 in this box? Son, that’s for a long dirty weekend. And why is there 6 in this box? Son, that’s for a college ball weekend, 2 x Fri, 2 x Sat and 2 x Sun. Then why is there 12 in this box? Son, that’s for the married man – 1 for Jan, 1 for Feb…… Why was she born so...
Back Beard announces his Sunday birthday run – there may be whisky at the on on (and indeed there was _)
Juicy Pussy has a last charge. Who are the LCH3 FRB’s? Tiger Lily, Spermy, Durian Dog??? But today it was none of those. Today it was Cherry Picker – no way, Back Beard – seriously, and Ayam Zinking – there’s something wrong here – who ate all the pies?
And so at 8:30, it’s time to go to the Crabless Master. Great circle GM’s, and well done hares, and thanks for the Scorpio T shirts (especially the small sized ones). On on on.
Lion City HHH : Run 1962 Circle Report
Friday 25th October 2019
Run #1962 – Scorpios’ run
Run Site: Jalan Lam Sam
Hares: Astronut, Stash and Strapless
On-on: Master Crab
Total Run/ Circle Attendance: 46 of which 38 Members (19F, 19M)
Virgins: Viking Jan
Guests & Returnees: Back Beard, Tight Grip, Vibrator, Pink Fanny, Private Parts, Dirty Groper and Topless
Circle Scribe: Fawlty Towers, Photos: Poser
It’s 7:45pm, and Chastity Belt and stand in GM – Wonton, circle us up, and call in the hares. Hang on, where’s Hopalong Strapless? And what did we really think of the Scorpio run? Too short ! Run of the year ! (Strapless). Why the torch? (Cherry Picker). But according to our GM, although under the hour, it was within guidelines, and since there was even some new territory for Bully, it’s declared a GOOD RUN. Here’s to the hares, they’re true blue…
Tell us about your on on? But the boys have done their job and so it’s left to Wonton – Master Crab, but there’s no crab, Blk 475 Choa Chu Kang somewhere. $12 and maybe some free beers.
Next weeks run? We already had that, when Dead Fish announced at the beginning of the run, then promptly departed. It’s at Dempsey, behind Saint Georges Church, followed by a Samy’s on on for a belated Deepavali (should be plenty of marks, since there has been a Sunday, Monday and Wednesday run there in recent weeks).
On in the Virgin – Jan. He was made to come by another Nordick, so let’s give the Viking a note – He’s all right, he’s all right, he’s got a teeny, weenie…
Guests and Returnees are called in – same, same. And we have: Back Beard, Tight Grip, Vibrator,
Pink Fanny, Private Parts, Dirty Groper and Topless - Here’s to them, they’re true blue….
And now, its time, for, the Hare, whip? Astronut calls in his fellow Scorpion hares – Stash andStrapless. And what colour tape should we never use again? Blue. Seems the boys tried it on the recce, and it didn’t work as it was next to impossible to see. But since Strapless had reams of the cheapo tape, then the Ox’s decided - let’s use it anyway. Here’s to the blue movie hares, they’re true blue….
But b4 he could hop out of the circle, Stash calls back Strapless. Why is he limping? Seems our daredevil hare was testing the log bridge, and fell down and hurt his ankle. Although a good test dummy, the heavyweights had yet to make the crossing – Astronut and Stash – who ate all the pies?….
And Strapless stays in, and says that Stash had gone out of his way to set an eloquent trail, following the new fence line, however, some people don’t understand their girth, but claim it was really their chest. On in Back Beard for attempting, and failing, to crawl under the fence – he ate all the pies…
Astronutannounces that this is the 30th Scorpio run, and most of us have 30 effing Scorpio T shirts at home. But still some can’t find one to wear to the Scorpio run! On in Coo Chi Coo, Dominator, Mother Mary (she even contributed to the T shirts) and Dirty Hacker – they ought to be publicly…..
And finally – get Hopalong a seat, b4 he falls down, and give him a drink – for doing an umbrella recce whilst his co-hare was sunning his ass in Bali – he’s the meanest...
Chastity Belt pulls back Stash – what’s this about setting an eloquent run? That’s how Circle Jerk sounds when he does his BBC interviews, or how Posh Pussy looks at the ball, but eloquent hash??? B.I.M.B.O….
And now it really is time for the Mystery Whip – after several falsies, it really isn’t Cherry Picker, it’s on in Sweet Thighs, who calls in Posh Pussy – seems they buddied up on the run – hey, let’s walk together – like we’re a couple. ButCoo Chi Coo wanted to make it a threesome. And then there was Awesome4some and Topless (who had a split up to here – pointing at her hip). But it seems our Viking Virgin, got a bit excited and was also showing too much flesh, so bring in his co-Viking – Private Partsfor a B.I.M.B.O. down down. Explaining about the comments from a recent haircut a couple of days ago, and all the comments received – oh, that’s short, Sweet Thighs overheard one of the harriettes explain about her bad day in the hair salon. Seems whilst she was having a hair cut (not a blow dry), Tight Grip’s hairdresser let go with something that blew her hair away – she’s alright, she’s alright…..