Run 1909 Circle Report

Friday 26th October 2018

Run Site: W End of Jalan Lam Sam

Hares: Stash, Strapless, Astronut

On-on: Master Crab Seafood

Total Run/ Circle Attendance: 47 of which 40 Members (19 F, 21 M)

Virgins:                                   Not this week

Guests & Returnees:                 7(3F, 4 M)

Milestones: Puul Toy 50, Stick Her Shock 100, Pokai 200

New Members:                        Julie & Kwon

Next Week’s Hares:       Comes Quietly & Bibrator

Run Site & On-on: see first page

Circle Scribe: Airborne Photos: Sorry About That

It’s 8:10pm and our GM Puck Smuggler has got his puck stuck or something, still primping himself but GMs Puck Me Lately has a plane to catch so “Form A Circle” cries the lady in a voice reminiscent of Margaret Thatcher RIP. So an incredulous circle shambles itself into being. WDWTOT Run? Has the be the wildest, wettest and shiggyest so far this year, with runners coming back from all directions and the usual FRBs calling loudly off trail. Nobody got totally lost thoughCherry Picker had to rescue a group of 5 late starters blundering around in the hulu. Verdict? A hung vote but what a hell of a run! “They may be a joy to their mothers, they’re a pain in the …” Tell us about your on-on? This week’s gastronomic paradise is Master Crab Seafood at Choa Chu Kang Terrace.

No virgins this week after a bumper bundle last, Guests were Fatt & Sweaty, Buzz Lightyear, Chicken Dicken & Uncle Sperm off Ice, with Returnees Wet Landing, Tiger Lily and Croc o’ S#t.

New Members: welcome to Julie, who’s forgotten her hash name, & Kwon, one of last week’s virgins, “Here’s to Alzheimer’s…”

Hare Whip: starts with Stashwho wants to know, was there one person who ran the right run? [It would be a miracle if so, a wet trail competing with soggy bog roll in the gathering darkness-Scribe] So who took everyone off trail? On in Sperm off Ice for leading all astray and screwing up what might have been run of the year – sez the hares. But GM has finally finished putting the Gatsby Grease on his golden locks to appear in the circle and commute the charge to “Here’s to hares…” and of course recognizing the rather nice candy orange Scorpio T-shirtcomplete with a reminder to Stash to stop lying about his age…

Birthday Time for all the Scorpios and particularly Stash for reaching the Big 60, he’s joined by Astronut, Strapless, Bagless, Mother Mary & Iron Crotch for a D-D not forgetting absent ScorpiosFawlty Towers and Count Dracula.

PSA from Voting B* - a reminder about the Dinner & Dance where Puck Smuggler has been allocated 10 minutes for his speech – “ TOO LONG!” come the shouts.

Then it’s Milestone Time, First in is Puul Toy who has finally clocked up 50 runs…but wait a minute, who’s next? Stick Her Shock, she’s done 100 so we see who in the family is giving who the runaround _ “Off-Off…” and she obliges with a flash of a well-filled black bra. Finally trumping all with a score of 200 is PoKai Off-Off is modestly declined. “They ought to be…”

Mystery Whip is Wonton who wants to give an extra greeting to Scorpios Mother Mary & Iron Crotch. But it’s young man Trolley Dolly who gets the D-D “Here’s to the young one, he’s true blue..”

TOTW time and looks like the GM has been busy. “Trump is funny… but I need some help…” Come on in Coo Chi Coo, Bagless, Sperm off Ice, 8.24, Astronut, In & Out, Croc o’ S#t, Roo Rooter Cherry Picker… as each man comes in, GM hands him a script, and his homework turns out to have been the immortal words of Chairman Trump. GM has gathered a collection of the most mind buggering. The circle has to listen and decide which is delivered most Trumpfully….

On in… SOI: “I think I am actually humble. I think I’m much more humble than you would understand”sadly SOI’s Irish brogue doesn’t quite do it justice…

Coo Chi Coo: “All of the women on The Apprentice flirted with me – consciously or unconsciously. That’s to be expected.” Well, of course CCC would empathise…_

Bagless: “Let me tell you, I’m a really smart guy…”

Astronut:“Sorry, losers & haters, but my IQ is one of the highest – and you all know it! Please don’t feel so stupid & insecure. It’s not your fault!” Astronut, being an honest man, had a problem getting this out without going hysterical

Chicken Dicken: “My fingers are long and beautiful as, has been well documented, so are various other parts of my body…”

Croc o’ S#t: “He referred to my hands, if they’re small, something else must be small. I guarantee you there’s no problem. I guarantee it.”

Roo Rooter: “I’m also honoured to have the greatest temperament that anybody has.”

Cherry Picker: “I don’t think I’ve made mistakes. Every time somebody says I made a mistake, they do the polls and my numbers go up, so I guess I haven’t made any mistakes.”

In & Out: “I think the only difference between me and the other candidates is that I’m more honest and my women are more beautiful.”

8.24: “Why can’t we use nuclear weapons?”

The Circle was at its most restrained and did not say “Bulls#t, bulls#t…” even once, and after a short run-off, 8.24 had the advantage of going nuclear and got the robe of office.

GMs announces: “We have all the toys tonight…” So who’s got the lovely POTW? Cherry Picker says there’s only one more thing to run in more uncomfortable than a Red Dress and that’s TWO red dresses. We had our suspicions about this guy, is he a secret cross-dresser? But Stash is heard to state the obvious so finishes up being awarded the brown banana…”He ought to be publically…”

Mystery Mystery Whip… seems our GM is also suffering from Alzheimers, either that or he has a surplus of volunteer whips… we have BOTH Sperm off Ice and Chicken Dicken or was it Sperm off Chicken and Dicken Ice? “Here’s to the late comer, he’s true blue…” The double booking resolves itself into a double act, with CD calling in Stash and SOI charging the smoker haters. The confusion blossoms whilst SOI & CD give us the view from the FRBs Juicy Pussy and Blur Like Sotong … “Where are the lights?!!” They obviously didn’t find them ‘cos they came back from the opposite end of Jalan Lam Sam…”B-I-M-B-O..”

Tummies are beginning to rumble and at last it’s time for AOB, first up is Ditch who calls in Blur Like Sotong who’s seriously blurred this week ‘cos he lost his specs…”Here’s to blurry, he’s true blue…” and might need a man with a red flag in front to help him drive home. After that comes Coo Chi Coo who can’t leave the women alone, summons new member Julie with a reminder that the Harriets run on Wednesdays…3-2-1 DD.

Last word from a Scorpio harriet Mother Mary who wants to know if we liked the T-Shirt, ‘cos it’s mummy & daddy are Wonton & Stash… Well, of course we love it, so to the hares, MANY THANKS for a run that would challenge outward bounders, nearly overcoming the meteorological challenge and for your Scorpio generosity too…ON-ON-ON!!