And now, according to our learned GM Strapless, it’s time, for, the, Mystery, Whip??? Has the real GM done his job? Yes indeed, and it’s Saliva, who immediately targets Strapless. Where is Bully tonight? His home in bed informs Saliva to the hapless Strapless. Let’s get some more hapless one’s in – Dead Fish and Fake Virgin. Now tonight, Strapless tried to tell me what to do – just like Bully. But Bully was last seen trying to get on a cruise liner. Aged 80, he was deemed too high risk, and turned away. Thank God for that said Bully, can you imagine being confined with Dominator for 14 days? And then there was Fake Virgin – who rushed to the run site, only to realize he had forgotten his shoes, so he rushed back to his car to dash home and collect, but then forgot where his keys were! Let’s give these two a note – B.I.M.B.O…..
PoTW? Where’s the big willie? Apparently it was gifted to Tight Lips, who is getting married tomorrow, but the Pr#ck has decided to retire – what’s wrong with him?
MMW? It’s Coo Chi Coo. When I was a boy and first joined the hash, in those days, there was only one whip, who was pre announced, so no one would talk to them, for fear of being charged. So I started the Mystery Whip, where some one could be appointed, in secret, well in advance, so they had time to consider their charges. Let’s get a Look a Like in for our real GM – Chastity Belt. On in Rooning Sh#t, for appointing CCC at the last minute and being disorganized and not representing CCC’s vision of a true Mystery Whip – he’s the meanest…… Let’s play a little guessing game – who said this: I always run with my phone, in case I get lost? Yes, it was Fake Virgin. And who said this: I have not been running for such a long time? Yes, you’re correct again, it was Saliva, and how true was that? Here’s to the guilty pair……
GM’s – is there, any, other, business? Rooning Sh#t is straight in. Cherry Picker has been making falsie attempts into the circle all night – ok, you can stay in now says RS. And on in Puck Me Lately. Now, what do this pair have in common? Bimbo’s is the unanimous response. Yes indeed says RS. Tonight as he was rooning through the jungle, he heard Cherry Picker screaming like a baby – aghhh, agghhhhh, aggghhhhhhh – cobwebs!. And then PML runs past proclaiming to be a FRB, but quickly falls in behind the rooning machine. Aren’t you a FRB asks RS? Yes, but you go in front and collect the cobwebs for me. They’re the meanest….
Pokai is back in form. When men get old, they can get disillusioned. Now everyone knows I’m a nice person (cries of b/s, b/s…..), always smiling when taking your money. And as I collect for the LCH3 2k run, some have even sponsored kegs, and even pay for their partners. On in 8:24 and Coo Chi Coo. Now when you provide a service, it’s appropriate to say thank you. So when I took 8:24’s money for him and Spreads Easily and a keg, he said thank you – you’re welcome say Pokai. But CCC, when he came to pay, and I asked what about No Good and the keg, he generously pledged to give more money, but not for No Good or the keg, he was trying to buy my services. Why were they born so…….
Awesome4some has a delayed charge from a few weeks ago. Our newest member – PayLah! brought a whole bunch of young friends. I’ve never seen such co-ordinated teamwork. This group of 4, even stopped in unison, on the run, to do a co-ordinated shoe lace tie. I’m totally impressed. Drink it D.D.D.D…..
Seoul Man – Bend Over Rover, would like to thank the hares for their generosity. That trail, if set now in America, would have cost over $5 per km for the scarce commodity – toilet paper. I plan to run it in reverse and collect it all! Here’s to the Hares, they’re true blue…..
Puck Me Lately is in. I was asked by a newbie – WTF is AoB? And so I explained they could charge anybody, etc….. And then I’m asked – WTF is a T Check? So then I said, WTF, read the web site. Start considering names for WTF Frenchie newbie….. And Pokai also accusing the newbie Frenchie of committing a Ditch crime – calling on on at a T Check. There’s no naming tonight, but, he ought to be publicly….. He’s got no name, no family, no Godfather, no birth certificate (is he Australian?) WTF. Do something stupid next week and we’ll name you – He’s alright, he alright, he got a tiny, weenie …..
And so, at 8:30pm, it’s off for a Happy ending. Excellent run by our rescue hares, and well done by our stand in GM’s, and it’s on, on on.
Hares: Stash and Wonton
On-on: The Happy Kampong
Total Run/Circle Attendance: 46 of which 32 Members(15F,17M)
Virgins: Ying Xuan
Guests: Jatin, Rohanna, Bend Over Rover, Julian, Gaby, Banana In Public, Dead Fish, Jessica, Ron, Geoffrey, Ilhama, Nicola
Guest Hare: Larry
Circle Scribe: Fawlty Towers, Photos: Count Dracula
Welcome to another rescue run by our stand in GM’s - Strapless andWonton. Let’s get Stash in for the verdict. And what did we really think of the run, ask our GM’s? Not enough cobwebs, too much shiggy, Pre St. Pat’s run – ok, where running out of material – It was a rescue run, and a damn good one at that, declares Strapless. Here’s to the hares, they’re true blue…..
Tell us about your on on? It’s right there, in the Happy place, $12, 7 dishes, Asahi and Heineken, no Corona.
Next week’s run? It’s Puck Me Lately’s 1st St. Pat’s Day run, set by a Singaporean and an Irishman – Sperm Off Ice. Get yourself to Ang Mo Kio, St. 64, in your brightest emerald green, for the run of the year (until the next run anyway).
Virgins? Actually, there was one – Ying Xuan, but she escaped b4 the circle. She enjoyed the run and has promised to come again (so I think that still makes her a technical virgin?).
Visitors? Yes, lots of them - Jatin, Rohanna, Bend Over Rover, Julian, Gaby, Banana In Public, Dead Fish, Jessica, Ron, Geoffrey, Ilhama, Nicola – There is too many to introduce them all, so the GM’s select a few – there’s Bend Over Rover – An American who lives in Seoul, flew to Italy and then transited in Iran, Julian who apparently is loving it? The Brazilian gal – Gabriella, Jatin the Malaysian Buloh – with a special song – Thank-you, Thank-you, Terima Kasih…… And the Singaporean gal – Rohanna, who is ashamed of herself for not finding the hash earlier in her life. And then there was the San Fran sex tourist who’s been hanging in the Philippines. They’re alright, they’re alright, they’ve got……
Hare Whip enquires Strapless?Wonton anoints Stash for the job. But his props have disappeared already? Let’s get Pokai in to represent the young, super fit, and sexy virgin and her friend! Virgin Ying Xuan and second time runner Jessica were running tonight with Chicken Sh#t, and were overheard by Stash – slow down grandma, we can’t keep up, Drink it D.D.D.D…… Now usually on the hash in Singapore, we run on roads, and through HDB’s and generally not much shiggy, and we can get away with wearing white shoes. But tonight, there was loads of shiggy, and a water crossing or two, so what did Posh Pussy (still wearing her immaculate conception white shoes) do? She got her husband to carry her across! Here’s to Posh Pussy, she’s true blue, ………. Tried to get to heaven and her husband carried her all the way…..
Ditch has a PSA and he’s only half pissed so listen up and you’ll maybe get half of it. It’s the LCH3 2k run. When, asks Cherry Picker (isn’t he on the committee?) - Sat 27th July. Where you ask? Well it’s at Orchidville. How much, is the next rhetorical question from the self examiner who has all the answers - $60 for members ($70 for guests), but if you’d like to sponsor me a barrel I will help you drink it down, down, down, down……